29 August 2008

Positivo Espresso Club Rider Voluntary Recall

All bicycles on alert

The Positivo Espresso safety committee has identified a potential safety issue involving one of its riders, David L. If ridden by David L. and under certain conditions, bicycles, frames and components can crack, disintegrate or simply disappear in small white clouds, which may cause the bicycle or its components to end up in the trash can, completely loosing any previous affection by its owner.

According to his own statement, he "
managed to break -- various ti [titanium] and steel frames, seatpost collars, wheel rims, etc.".

To date there have been some reports of bike-injuries in the field, resulting in major damage to the used bicycle. Though David L. completed visa procedure when entering Japan and properly obtained his alien registration card, this issue was not uncovered during these standard procedures and the damage on bike components only showed up in the field.

The Japanese government feels that David L. meets the immigration standard, that it is therefore acceptable to let him ride bikes and that no further action is required. Positivo Espresso does not share this opinion and therefore, is proceeding with a rider recall of David L.

However, please note that this does not affect riders named David in general, such as David J., David M., David D. or David N. in any way, as all of them have a completely different structural body design.

For some reasons, defying logical explanations, David L. is not able to break or destruct bicycles components which are already on product recall by the manufacturer, such as Cervelo SL forks or Look Keo pedals.

IDENTIFYING THE RECALLED RIDER

The recalled rider normally wears a Positivo Espresso team jersey, sometimes also an ASSOS Kachastan national jersey. Bicycles should be alert if they here the sound of a bell accompanied by a male voice shouting "torimaaaaaaaaaaaass".

2 comments:

David L. said...

Thanks, Michael!!
I've never been the subject of a recall before, but I will do my best to reemerge at an appropriate time as a new, improved, stronger, lighter and faster rider, who is easier on equipment and less of a threat to the bicycles of Japan. And please note that I have never injured someone else's bicycle. If only I rode the "regular" frame sizes sold in Japan, maybe I could get new models for use as an equipment tester?? My odl Giant TCR carbon frame, Cervelo carbon frame, AND Bianchi Pista Concept 2006 aluminum frames are all rock solid and undamaged.
Separately, Azuma Shokai did confirm that they will take care of my Cervelo and will give Nagai-san all the details next Monday. The great thing about Japan is that you can call the importer who last week was skeptical about helping a gaijin who bought a frame abroad, and when they ask you if you have a bike shop where you regularly take your bike, and you say "Nagai-san at Positivo", they treat you well and say they will call him directly to personally coordinate the repair schedule.

If all goes well I will have a new front fork by the weekend of Sept 6-7.

mob said...

Wow. This must have been the fastest comment ever in the history of the Positivo Espresso blog. I am glad that you take the post with humour, I wasn't so sure when I posted it and ready to remove it and apologize any time.

Do you still have a bike to ride out tomorrow, or are you waiting for the fork?